The Friday Trap

I had a crazy Friday at work. Of course, when I got home, I had the desire to eat out, to let down, to eat foods that really are not foods. I did have a glass of green juice and that helped. I veered off track a little, but not bad for a Friday night. I feel like I am safely through the worst now, which really means that I no longer feel the urge to have anything. Instead of going completely off the rails, I had some dates (4-5), toast (2 small gluten free pieces), peanut butter in addition to walnuts, and a banana I really did not need. It all tasted good, and even though I wasn't very far off of plan, I did feel like it all was a treat. I also stopped when I felt satisfied. I will mark today as success even though I wasn't perfect.

Removing All the Addicting Foods

I am on another day of success and am feeling like a much different person than I did even five days ago. I have been completely on Dr. Fuhrman's six-week plan, which includes removing all salt, added oil, animal products, and sugar. It also includes focusing on getting leafy greens, fresh vegetables, seeds, beans, nuts, fruits. Like I said yesterday, my mental clarity is much improved and my energy levels are greatly increased. I have not felt tired and certainly do not feel the need for coffee or caffeine. Even though I have not had caffeine since early August, there are days I still definitely want it. In fact, the next time I do feel that need, I am going to juice a variety of greens. The juicing is proving a powerful tool in helping me succeed right now.

The most important learning that comes out of this week is that I need to remove all addictive foods--sugar, salt, animal products and processed foods. Even eating small portions trigger problems for me and just make it harder to stay on plan--especially in my transition. I am certain that at some point, I will add them in again. But, for now, I can only think of today and plan tomorrow. But, I am feeling strong right now and am building off of success. It helps, too, that I have taken off a good ten pounds since Saturday. I am sure that will all slow down now after this dramatic transition from terrible eating last week to great eating this week.

Fridays always trigger nasty patterns for me. I decided that for this Friday night, I am going to make a larger portion of green juice and have that. If I am not hungry, that is all I will have. Mr. Conundrum and I both love the taste of green juice and he thinks that will be a real treat, too. The beauty of a glass of green juice is that I think it will halt my cravings and because it feels like a treat, it may also curb my emotional eating.

My goal this time through is to commit for a lifetime to this type of eating and to take off the weight once and for all. I am not naive enough to think there won't be challenges, but I am tired of doing the same struggle over and over again and always wishing my weight to be different. I just need to make it happen and live the life I want to lead now.

Clarity of Mind and Increased Productivity

Today, I went and lifted weights and ran. It felt good, and I broke a great sweat running. It felt like I was getting rid of impurities now that my diet is cleaner. That may just be my imagination, but it felt like what it felt and that helps my mindset.

Today at work, I had so much to do, and I felt that clarity of mind that comes with healthier eating. I am actually eating quite healthy, but since I am only really a few days in full force, I can only say healthier eating :-). In fact, I have so much to do this year that I feel like the only way I will get through the year is if I do, in fact, stick to this plan. I am feeling much better and sleeping pretty well for the first week of school.

I am currently weighing myself daily--more because I am curious about how quickly my body is changing. Sometimes, I stay away from the scale because of impatience. But, right now, I am weighing out of curiosity. For what it is worth, I don't feel impatient this time around. Perhaps because I am on this for good. Perhaps because I am so busy.

Mr. C. and I juiced swiss chard, kale, cabbage, zucchini, orange, and squeezed juice of half a lime at the end. It was stronger than the other juices we have had, but I really liked the effect it had on me. If I succeed this time around, I think it will be because of the green juice. It really is refreshing and helps take cravings away very quickly--quicker than the food.

Momentum Part 2

I have had another good day. I have taken off 9 pounds since Saturday by changing my diet. I know a lot of that is water weight, but I feel so much better than I did 4 days ago.

I am eating the Fuhrman plan, and I am pleased with my staying on plan. One thing I have done yesterday and today is added green juice into the mix. I cannot believe how refreshing that is. Yesterday, I made a cucumber, lime, orange, apple, and kale juice mix. Mr. Conundrum and I both really enjoyed that mix. Then, today, I made a kale, swiss chard, orange, zucchini and lime mix that was delicious. I found myself energized by both the drinks that I had with dinner.

I am hoping to keep up with the juicing this year. The risk for the juicing is adding too much fruit, so today I went down to one piece of fruit. Mr. C. and I split the drink so that was the juice of half an orange.

Breakfast: Green smoothie with blueberries, strawberries, kale, romaine lettuce, and banana and a few beans

Lunch: Romaine lettuce salad with pinto, garbanzo, and black beans, cucumber, tomato, carrots and an orange juice, pomegranate juice and cashew dressing

Dinner: Steamed kale, spinach, mushrooms, onions, and zucchini, watermelon and cashews

All in all, things are going so much better. I feel so satisfied and distant from my cravings. Honestly, all the greens help, but I love the addition of the green juice. It really helps me. I feel very positive and like I can continue this tomorrow. And, that is what I plan to do.

Momentum

Yesterday was a bit of challenge to stay on track. However, I did manage to pull off an okay day. I stayed away from grains, meat, cheese. I did have eggs and wine and a date/nut treat. The scale was down today after two better (but not perfect days). Just dropping some of the bloat really takes away the weight. I feel much better, just reinforcing the lesson that grains and bad food is addictive to me and impacts my body in mental and physical ways--all of which are destructive.

Today is the final day before three of us start school. Mr. Twister still has a couple days to go before he starts, so he will spend time with grandma. Today, I have a lot to do. I feel good because I started the day with a 4 mile run with just a bit walking at the beginning to warm up. It felt good and the weather was lovely. Also, yesterday, I got the pesky closet/room cleaning that I wanted to get done this summer. Nothing like waiting till the final moment--sigh. But, it feels like a burden is lifted to have that cleaned--especially since I am donating a lot of things and clearing out some space.

I need to buy groceries for the week. I am getting healthy options for myself. For the moment, that is progress. In the throes of addiction, momentum is sometimes the hardest thing to find.

Time to Turn Myself Around

The final two weeks of August were not good for me, and I took it out on myself. I ate poorly and then did not feel like exercising. That is the most important thing I need to remember: how counterproductive bad foods are on my mental health. The mental health really impacts the physical health (and vice versa). For me, the bad foods generally start the process.  I eat foods that contribute to disease, not health, and I do not exercise like I should. And, I also understand that I am addicted to the unhealthy foods. I must break the addiction if I plan to get off the roller coaster, and to do that, I need to stop emotional eating.

Yesterday, I started eating better. It should be no surprise that exercising went better today than yesterday--even though yesterday was only walking and today was run/walking. I did not sleep well last night. But, the weather was glorious: a delightful fall day with low humidity! How refreshing was that. For me, I know humidity plays a role in my summer issues. I should probably chart humidity levels with my eating patterns. I think, too, the fact that we do not have central air impacts my response to humidity. Our window air conditioners just do not tackle the humidity or cooling very effectively in hot humid weather. I know the humidity does not help my weight. In some ways, I think I have reverse seasonal affective disorder where I get depressed in summer and feel better the other three seasons.

I did weigh myself yesterday, and the results were awful. I am glad that I did this, though, because often I do not weigh myself at a high. Then, I regret it as I start with a lower number in terms of seeing progress. Plus, I do not want to be in denial about my weight because that, too, is counterproductive.

Today, I am cleaning some things at home that have been weighing me down mentally. It feels very good. Of course, I planned to get to them all summer, but that never happened. I plan to continue this momentum today. I am at the top end of my "too big" clothes. I also plan to do some shopping today. Sadly, I am going to need to rely on my blue shirt for the start of school. I think I am going to get rid of this round of big clothes after they are just that. I did that with the two sizes above where I am now, and I  have never gone there again. Keeping these clothes fosters a mindset that it is okay to choose destructive eating paths, which I no longer want to do for my health and my weight.

All the reasons I need to lose weight:

be around for my family
overall health
vanity (of course this plays a role)
blood pressure
diabetes
ability to enjoy life
good mental health
easier aging process

I know there are more reasons, but that is a start for right now.

August Recap

• August was a good month for exercise. Sadly, though, I have let things go a little bit at the end of August. It did not help that my bike broke and since finances have been tight, I have not replaced it or fixed it. The bike is 19 years old. I would like to upgrade to a more serious bike. I have postponed the decision till spring, though. I do want to commit to biking a lot next year, though, so I am hoping to be able to afford the bike then. Weight-wise: I am higher than I was at the beginning of August. It is time to change that.

• August 2: Ran/walked 4 miles
• August 3: Biked 12 miles
• August 6: Biked 12 miles
• August 8: Elliptical 5.5 miles (intervals of 4 and 10 resistance)
• August 9: Lifted weights and ran/walked 4 miles
• August 10: Biked 12 miles
• August 11: Ran/walked 6 miles and 4.25 miles on elliptical with easier interval resistances (3 and 1)
• August 12: Walked/ran 4.25 miles
• August 14: Ran most of 6 miles
• August 15: Lifted weights, 4.25 on elliptical with intervals 4 and 10
• August 16: 5 miles-ran 3 and walked 2
• August 17: Biked 11 miles, lifted weights, ran/walked 1.5 miles
• August 19: Ran/walked 6 miles
• August 22: Walked/ran 6 miles
• August 23: Weightlifting and 5 miles on elliptical at intervals 4 and 12
• August 27: 6 mile walk/run
• August 30: 2.75 Walk/Run